Game On: Thriving in Private Equity While Raising Strong Daughters

[00:00:00] Hello and welcome to The Balancing Act. I’m your host, Sarah Sheridan, director of Sales and recruiting at Hirewell and Mom to three little ones. For today’s episode I am super excited to welcome our guest, Susan Scutt, PE, operating partner, and mom to two girls. Susan, welcome. So glad to be here.

[00:00:20] Thank you. Yes. After some minor tech issues, we have arrived. I’ve confirmed I’m, tech illiterate with all the new gadgets that are out there. I’m right there with you. Awesome. Well, lets kick things off. I’d love to,

[00:00:38] , start things off, if you can tell us a little bit more about your career journey and maybe highlight some, key steps that led you to your current position.

[00:00:48] Certainly. Well,

[00:00:49] I started my career so long ago, back in the stone ages, but I actually did, coding back then, oh my gosh, C on Unix, for those of you in the tech world. But I did that for about four years and then I [00:01:00] did business consulting. And then I had my first daughter and decided to take some time off.

[00:01:06] So I took six years off, all in, in supporting the two girls and getting them to an age where I felt ready to go back to work. And then jumped into kind of a supply chain consultant role at Dell. Spent about seven and a half years at Dell. Just kind of as a fix it person. Honestly, I came in and fixed a broken operation and they’re like, okay, now it’s time to go fix this area or stand up this new function.

[00:01:33] Which was really fun. But I got bit by the private equity bug, about almost 12 years ago. And ended up taking a role where I led the transformation. I was hired to lead the transformation of a portfolio company of a very prominent, private equity firm, and, have not turned away since. I led that transformation

[00:01:54] as chief of staff to the CEO at the time. Then went to work at that private equity firm for about three and a half [00:02:00] years. And then since then went and stood up portfolio operations at another firm. And, you know, finally I met, at a fourth firm, continuing to do the operational side of private equity, working with executives and companies and

[00:02:15] working to transform companies and just make them more, efficient and effective. Love it. Well, I know it’s always hard to condense your entire life into a two minute spiel, but that was, very helpful. It’s, well, and it’s funny, I do turn to those first two experiences is really laying the foundation. Yes.

[00:02:34] For what I do now, because coding is really taking a big opportunity and breaking it into bite-sized chunks, or opportunity or problem, and breaking it into bite-sized chunks and solving for it with code. And then the business consulting side is doing the same thing but solving for it with people, process, systems.

[00:02:52] And it’s kind of still what I do now. And it’s, you know, kind of what I have in my DNA to go do probably until I [00:03:00] retire. Oh, love it. And now let’s switch over to Family Life. I know you’ve got two daughters. Can you tell me a little bit more about just ages, names? Certainly. So my older daughter is, oh my goodness, 25.

[00:03:15] That makes me really old. But she isdoing her thing within the business world and very proud of her in that regard. and then my younger daughter graduated from undergrad a year ago, and she just applied to med school or many med schools, so we’re kind of keeping our fingers crossed and looking to see where she gets accepted.

[00:03:32] But, so yeah, you know, certainly have seen, and experience kind of the work life balance or, as we call it, but there is really no balance. Yeah. It’s kind of work life integration over the years. Yeah. Yeah. And then I did get, remarried a couple years ago, or three years actually, this week.

[00:03:49] And, I have two stepsons and very proud of them, also in their twenties and, you know, figuring out life. Oh, amazing. Well, and then kind of thinking [00:04:00] over your career choices throughout your career, how would you say your decisions have really been influenced by, you know, your daughter’s needs, stages of life, and then any, particularly tough career decision you had to make in order to really prioritize your family?

[00:04:21] Certainly. .Well, my first decision, that was due to my children was deciding to stop working.

[00:04:27] And part of that was, just on a personal, I had a very tough pregnancy and kind of, you know, had a little bit of a wake up call on what’s important in life. And so, I did decide to take some time off.

[00:04:38] I’ll say, my kids look back in the six years that I took off, they’re like, how did you not like go crazy? Because I am definitely not a typical like, stay at home mom. I’m not sure how I did not go crazy in those six years. But, certainly I look back and I’m very grateful that I had that opportunity to spend with them.

[00:04:56] But, you know, a lot of people don’t have that [00:05:00] opportunity.

[00:05:00] But I was itching to go back for a while, and when I finally did, I will say that was another tough decision because it not only on the kid front, but I mean, having not done anything work-wise for six years, it was tough going back and kind of getting back into that routine.

[00:05:18] As well as just, you know, finding a job that doesn’t look at, well, what have you done for six years? And, hold that against you. And luckily, Dell didn’t do that and took me with open arms. So I’m very, very grateful for that. But, I think in both cases, leaving the workforce, getting back into the workforce, big, big moves.

[00:05:36] And then I’ll say, you know, I made a decision very, consciously to, in some cases not go for that promotion or not go for, that next step. Because, truth be told, not only was I a working mom, but I was a working single mom. And so for a good chunk of, their youth, I had to, make sure that I had the flexibility that, [00:06:00] again, certain careers, certain roles don’t afford you.

[00:06:03] And so, yeah, I think as women in some cases, and I mean as just parents, you have to sometimes kind of weigh the pros and cons. And to me. Again, especially in their early years being available and not being, on the road or not being so, consumed with work was really important. Now that being said, I’m super ambitious and so it wasn’t like I cruised in my career, but I did

[00:06:28] make sure that I was in an environment with, you know, who I worked for and the scope of my role and just the requirements of my role that I could make their, little award time at school or their dance recital or that sort of thing. So those, and then, once I got into private equity, it was, it was kind of game on.

[00:06:45] Yeah. Came to, yeah. So, you know, and certainly that I didn’t go into that, you know, naively. I knew what I was signing up for. And so, at that time I actually, had hired a live-in nanny and really, again, made some [00:07:00] decisions that enabled me to feel good, or at least, pretty good with what I was gonna go venture to do.

[00:07:07] Ultimately it was the right choice for me career wise. But, you know, as a mom you’re like, am I making the right decision? Are my kids gonna hate me for this, and what if they, wake up in the middle of the night and I’m not there? Again, they survive and quite frankly, my older daughter told me when she went to college.

[00:07:22] She was like, a lot of kids struggled because, their moms had done, or their dads had done so much for them, and she’s like, you didn’t always do that for us, so me jumping into college was not as, life changing. And she said it with, you know, a bit of humor. Yeah, backhanded compliment.

[00:07:39] I was like, oh, okay. Sorry. But again, you make choices and, there’s consequences. And so, sometimes it’s more on the side of family. Sometimes it’s more on the side of career. And as long as you’re, kind of very realistic with yourself on the pros and cons, you make relatively good decisions.

[00:07:57] Definitely. It’s interesting that you brought [00:08:00] that up when I was interviewing another female executive, who is kind of in the midst of fundraising and always traveling. She had a bit younger kids, but really feels like they developed kind of some skill sets that made them a bit more independent and able to kind of like self play at an earlier age, almost as a result of her busy schedule, which, I think made a lot of sense.

[00:08:25] Well, I think you set a good example, as well, just, some days I chose to be a better mom, less good worker or employee, and other days you choose to be like that, you know, really, dedicated employee worker, team member. And, you know, those two often don’t intersect.

[00:08:44] And so some days my kids saw that I had to prioritize work for whatever reason. And I mean, they survived, but they did see when I really need, when they really needed me. They could count on me to be there. Yeah, and I love that when we chatted earlier, that stood out to me, you mentioned [00:09:00] some days I’m a better mom, some days a better employee, which again, like after interviewing so many female execs, very similar sentiment, do you have any kind of like advice or words of wisdom for newer moms who are still kind of struggling to even accept that reality that,

[00:09:21] you know, I think a lot of times we put pressure on ourselves to show up perfectly in both roles. So any advice that would just kind of ease that expectation? Yeah, I think one is don’t beat up on yourself. Everyone goes through those sort of struggles. If you’re in an ambitious career and you’ve got children and needs, at the home and I mean, there’s others that have even, needs when it comes to their parents and taking care of, you know, elderly family members.

[00:09:51] But ultimately it’s get rid of the guilt. Like again, just accept. Yeah. You know, some days I’d end the day and go, oh man, I was not that good of a mom. [00:10:00] Like, but you just can’t dwell on it. It’s like, but I had a deadline or I had to, fly to such and such city.

[00:10:06] Other days you go, wow, I was there for my kids and, you know, and maybe I let some things slide at work and it’s okay. It all shakes out. I think it’s, having that awareness again. And it took me a while because I lived in a world, I grew up Catholic, so I like, have guilt, in my DNA which is bad.

[00:10:24] But, and so it took me a while to like, let go of this. Yeah. But the other thing especially is seeing how resilient kids are. I mean, they’re not to be coddled and, you know, my kids often made fun of me ’cause I was like the suck it up mom. Like. Guys suck it up.

[00:10:40] Like let’s go and quit dwelling on whatever it is that you’re dwelling on. But again, I think it builds resilience and you know, studies have shown resilience is like one of the keys to success. So yeah. And it’s something that does need to beappreciated more just in general, but. But yeah, just don’t beat yourself up.

[00:10:58] Yeah. Yeah. I think that’s great [00:11:00] advice. And it’s not seeing something as you’re 50% here and 50% there. I think you said it perfectly. You know, some days you just have to give more to this role. Other days you’re gonna overcompensate and make it up in this area. So lots of gray is kind of a theme here.

[00:11:16] Exactly, exactly. And just suck it up. Yeah, suck it up too. Get over it. Exactly. And then kind of thinking over the years as, looking back to when your daughters were younger. What would you say were some of the biggest challenges at that time when it came to balancing a family career, life, and how have those challenges evolved as your daughters, got older over the years?

[00:11:44] Well, first of all, I thought I had this naive perception that when my kids hit a certain age, like it would get so much easier and it actually, early days are hard. Like, you know, young babies, toddlers, just they’re totally [00:12:00] relying on you. Yeah. And then I feel like, so that’s a lot. And I mean, that’s lack of sleep and that’s just, the demand.

[00:12:05] Yeah. It’s my world right now. Yes. Having little itty bitties. And then my experience is like, there’s a point, which it does get a bit easier, like they’re kind of, older, more, they’re still, I mean they’re still, obviously needing you. But it’s a little easier from just a scheduling standpoint.

[00:12:27] But then what kicks in is I want to spend more time with them just to play, to be, there and present. And I think the tough thing there is, getting away from my phone and getting away from my computer and really, really being present. Because that’s when they want to play with you and like actually, you know, pay attention to mom.

[00:12:46] And desire our time. And then the teenage years come and then, other Yeah. Bigger emotions, bigger problems. And I would say in that phase, they certainly don’t wanna spend a ton of time with their mom. But that’s [00:13:00] where I felt like I had to be more just aware of who they were hanging out with, what was really going on.

[00:13:08] What was their underlying like emotional state, things that they wouldn’t actually share, but I needed to pick up on. And so that’s, that was the tough part with me taking this very challenging travel demanding role is that I wasn’t always there. So it was kind of relying on some friends and making sure that, you know, I just was there when I was needed.

[00:13:29] And it wasn’t necessarily when they asked me to be, but it was there when they actually needed me and didn’t know that they needed me. And then, I mean, you know, now, it’s, they’re out of the house and, but I love the friendships that we have and it’s a totally different kind of relationship.

[00:13:43] But you still worry. I mean, I still stress out over, I still track them to make sure that they’re, at their apartments at night. I would bet that doesn’t go away. It never ends. But yeah, I thought at some point in time, you know, kind of, my mothering is done and I will just focus on me and no, it’s, no, it doesn’t exist.

[00:13:59] Which is [00:14:00] good. Which is good. Yeah. And you know how over the years, I mean you travel, the private equity is so intense, mothering two daughters. What were some of the strategies or practices you think were most effective in helping you, I don’t even wanna say thrive, but just kind of keep everything above water and manage everything on your plate.

[00:14:25] Again, I had some really good leaders, that understood in particular that I was a single mom and so if the school called, they knew I was going to leave a meeting early and I think it’s, being transparent. And I just tend to share that upfront so that I set a bit of boundary on, hey, I mean I’m very dedicated to this role, but being a single mom, may require that I, in some cases drop some things.

[00:14:51] It’s having that conversation with your leader, and having the right kind of leader that is supportive of that. Again, I was fortunate to have that.[00:15:00] And I don’t think people always have that. So yeah, and in some cases it also was, because I had to attend this school thing, maybe it is putting in a longer night or working over, consecutive, weekends or what have you.

[00:15:14] So it is some give and take. And, you know, in some cases it means a bit of a social life, suffers. But, I looked at my kids as my social life to a certain extent. So, you know, again, you have to come to a state in your head where it all balances out. It may not be the same level of balance for everyone.

[00:15:34] I think in some cases, some years I was definitely more mom than great worker. And then other years, I put my career in front of, some other things. So yeah, I mean, you just have to kind of balance it all out. I love that because I think it shows it’s fluid.

[00:15:50] You know, there’s seasons of life where you have to be more mom, just the season of your kid’s life. But that doesn’t mean you can’t then come back and be more [00:16:00] dedicated and engaged at work. And I think that’s what’s hard. We can look at it very black and white and think, oh, if I’m not as engaged or I have to pop out earlier for pediatrician appointments, that kind of puts me off course when in reality

[00:16:16] it sounds like, that’s not true. Well, and again, if I spent a lot of time worrying about the perceptions of others that I left work early that day, or you know, and I wasn’t in this meeting or I wasn’t there in person because I couldn’t travel. Like again, you could drive yourself nuts.

[00:16:32] Right. And I think that’s where like, just stop. Yeah. Stop. Make the decision and just don’t look back and don’t overanalyze. I mean, because you made that decision that’s right for you, may not be the same one others make. The other key thing was, and I certainly needed to do this as a single mom, but simplify your life.

[00:16:54] Like, I mean, everything I could do to just simplify my [00:17:00] existence. Like outsourcing or just, as opposed to having, and this is a silly one, but like, a bunch of, incoming mail and all kinds of things that are just not very important at the end of the day, just kind of cut all that out and as much as you can simplify your life so that you can focus on what’s really important.

[00:17:19] Yeah, I think that’s a key. I think that’s great advice. Yeah. And then you kind of touched on this, like having good managers. Understanding leaders is always a huge piece of this, but any other kind of family friendly benefits or policies that you’ve had, either at your current company or past companies where you felt, yes, like this is really supporting me as a working mom, or even when you were a single mom, anything that stands out.

[00:17:52] I mean, flexibility is the main one. And I will say, I’ve had it and I think [00:18:00] there’s mixed opinions on this nowadays, but, the ability to, in some cases work from home. If I had a sick child. I am a proponent of in office work. But there are days where, you know, that sick child can’t go anymore and you’ve gotta stay home. And so just the flexibility and time and where I do my work. I know personally, sometimes I get my best work done at night. And so also like allowing flexibility, allowing the work that your team members do to fit their work style.

[00:18:31] If that makes sense. Because again, sometimes I work best at like, just odd hours. Yeah. Solving problems in my head, once my head is clear and my kids are in bed. And, I think just having an environment that you work in that affords that. And you know, just having a healthy culture that you’re a part of, a supportive one makes sense. Again, you know, it’s also not allowing guilt to take over and you to stress out too [00:19:00] much, about making decisions that aren’t always the right decision, for others. That’s a great point. And then as a mom, how has that influenced how you show up, both as an executive and even just a people leader or people manager?

[00:19:19] Well, I do think that men and women lead differently. And it’s very stereotypical, of course to even say that. But I do think there are differences in, you know, and that’s where it’s great to have a mixture of both. Yeah. And again, I can’t speak for all women, but I think I do have, almost like I’d like

[00:19:39] to mentor and to, almost not in a mothering way by any means, but I do like to see my team members, grow and challenge them. And I mean, I equate that to kind of my kids where I have very much tough love and suck it up. But it’s all, you know, I tell them it’s all because I love them and I want them to do their best.

[00:19:58] Yeah. And similarly, I like [00:20:00] for my, the people that work for me and work with me. I want the best for them. So I think it’s bringing that like, suck it up, get going, but also with that challenger mindset to make sure that they can meet their potential and, so yeah, I, again, I don’t know that that’s unique to me or women but I do bring that and I find myself, you know, especially, there’s a point in my life where.

[00:20:27] There’s a book called Halftime, which talks about, the first part of your career is a lot about you’re consuming, kind of experiences and, you’re building a nest egg because you want to send your kids to college. And, but the second half is about giving back.

[00:20:38] And in my head, I’m in that phase where, I want to and why I’m doing this podcast. It’s like i’m hoping that someone listens to this and stops feeling guilty. Yeah. But, in addition to that, it’s just, I do want to leave, the people that I work with on a good footing and hopefully having been challenged, but yet also feeling like I care.

[00:20:59] Yeah. [00:21:00] Because I do. That’s a good challenger. I need to, my five-year-old when I try to be hard, but in her best interest, she always says, you’re being so mean, but I need to start using the word no, I’m challenging you. Exactly. I’m not being mean. My kids still give me grief over that. They’re like mom stop it. Actually, my older one,

[00:21:21] I always have this like, suck it up. Come on, let’s go. And she goes, mom, sometimes I just want a hug. I was like, oh. Okay, good. Right. Come over here. Lemme give you a hug.

[00:21:32] And then let’s go. And they’ve also called me out sometimes. Another lesson that I hope others take from this is, I’ll come home from work and I was still in work mode.

[00:21:41] I’m like, do to do to do with them. and they would be like, mom, we’re not your employees. Like, oh, you’re not, okay. Alright, I’ll change that tone. Alright. But I, again, I’ve had kudos to them for calling me out. Right, ’cause they were right. I was treating them like, little soldiers that needed to listen to me, [00:22:00] which they do.

[00:22:00] I mean, they still do, but Yeah, they don’t always agree with that. No. I love that story. Yeah. Well, Susan, you’ve been amazing. And stop it. No, you have it. And the humor and just the realness. But before we let you go, what would be like the one key takeaway you’d like our listeners to have from the show today?

[00:22:22] Oh, goodness. Or we can do two. Okay. Well, I mean, again, just stop feeling guilty. And the second one would be it’s not work life balance. It’s work life integration. And it’s okay to be a good mom one day and then a really great exec one day and never the two shall meet sometimes.

[00:22:44] So but that’s okay. It’s okay. Yeah. Yeah. I love that. That’s a theme that’s come out so much. Balance does not exist. It’s integration, it’s rhythm, it’s any other word. Except balance. Well, and the last thing I’ll say, I know you asked for two, but [00:23:00] I’m giving you three, is just like, look at it as a, a journey.

[00:23:03] I consciously made choices not to take roles or not to do things. But that was the right choice for that year. But then, you know, game on another year. But it all kind of evens out and just enjoy the journey, an overused phrase but it’s true. I love that. Yeah. Well, thank you for being here. Thank you so much for having me.

[00:23:23] This was fun. Yes, this was fun. And thank you guys for listening. Tune in next time for more insights on how to build a successful career, and raise a family.